Free Bingo Hunter - Play Bingo Online Bookmark Us!
You need to install Flash Player 9 to view our live bingo feed.

Free Bingo Hunter Forum - Bingo Chat Forum
  [Search] Search   [Recent Topics] Recent Topics   [Hottest Topics] Hottest Topics   [Members]  Member Listing   [Groups] Back to home page 
A cowboy named Bud  XML
Forum Index » Funny Stuff
Author Message
5stars


[Avatar]

Joined: 26/05/2010 23:05:18
Messages: 236
Offline


A cowboy named Bud

A cowboy named Bud was overseeing his herd in a remote mountainous pasture in California when suddenly a brand-new BMW advanced toward him out of a cloud of dust.



The driver, a young man in a Brioni suit, Gucci shoes, RayBan sunglasses and YSL tie, leaned out the window and asked the cowboy, "If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd, Will you give me a calf?"


Bud looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure, Why not?"



The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his Cingular RAZR V3 cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite to get an exact fix on his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo..



The young man then opens the digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing facility in Hamburg , Germany .



Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses an MS-SQL database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.



Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer, turns to the cowboy and says, "You have exactly 1,586 cows and calves."



"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says Bud. He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on with amusement as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.



Then Bud says to the young man, "If I can tell you exactly what your business is, will you give me back my calf?"



The young man thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"



"You're a Congressman for the U.S. Government", says Bud.



"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"



"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked. You used millions of dollars worth of equipment trying to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about how working people make a living - or about cows, for that matter.


This is a herd of sheep. ....

Now give me back my dog.
toadie


[Avatar]

Joined: 24/06/2010 15:52:46
Messages: 386
Offline

good one
nuznuz


[Avatar]

Joined: 26/04/2010 22:36:03
Messages: 775
Offline

haha
crabstick



Joined: 17/04/2010 17:46:08
Messages: 385
Offline

missjacob


[Avatar]

Joined: 15/04/2010 12:42:02
Messages: 559
Offline

lol
pkj666


[Avatar]

Joined: 05/02/2010 21:32:43
Messages: 605
Offline

lol
luckyday


[Avatar]

Joined: 15/02/2010 21:24:43
Messages: 745
Offline

lol
emily06


[Avatar]

Joined: 12/06/2010 15:24:36
Messages: 70
Offline

lol
emily06


[Avatar]

Joined: 12/06/2010 15:24:36
Messages: 70
Offline

lolll
muffin


[Avatar]

Joined: 14/04/2010 08:31:27
Messages: 586
Offline

lol
honda1


[Avatar]

Joined: 03/05/2010 21:13:32
Messages: 89
Offline

lol
senorita


[Avatar]

Joined: 27/05/2010 23:04:10
Messages: 1929
Offline

lmao
RichieJo


[Avatar]

Joined: 17/04/2010 15:40:19
Messages: 2041
Offline

lol. Very Good!
MOONCAT


[Avatar]

Joined: 19/03/2010 10:13:58
Messages: 660
Offline

ththrboss


[Avatar]

Joined: 14/02/2010 12:14:19
Messages: 368
Offline

lol
 
Forum Index » Funny Stuff
Go to:   
Powered by JForum 2.1.8 © JForum Team